Recently an incident had me pondering the concept of loyalty and if it was a reality or just an illusion? In this wonderful technological age where everything is so fast and disposable - is there still place for what may be perceived as an old-fashioned sentiment?
Being raised very "old-school" in the sense that I was taught to first prove myself before expecting any kind of reward was thrown out the window in the my last years of doing recruitment. The younger generation FIRST wanted to know what they would get out of a job before committing to providing their services and would move from one company to another at a blink of an eye - and sometimes for the most pathetic reasons! Loyalty to the company who was paying for their services seemed to be absolutely non-existent and there appeared to be very little that anyone could do to instill a sense of loyalty among their staff.
And of course the cynics have a field day with the concept of loyalty - doing absolutely nothing to try and foster this ability as a positive; instead coating it with derision and scorn under the guise of humour which make it seem OK? On second thoughts, maybe I should not be so hard on Grant Fairley as perhaps he too has been on the wrong end of the loyalty expectation. If he has made a commitment to a company or relationship and his loyalty was not taken into account when he was unceremoniously dumped ....... ?
Or am I looking at this from the wrong angle - it not being the loyalty aspect - could it be the lack of commitment that fails to produce the loyalty? Which comes first and is it possible to have one without the other?
It is tough if you are blessed with a positive attitude and have to keep smiling when everyone else around you is losing perspective and live under a miserable little cloud. And of course, misery loves company and they spread their toxic negativity far and wide and put a downer on everything and everything they touch. Never-mind the glass being half empty - the content is pure bile. So how does one expect loyalty from such a being? Simply - you don't!
On the other end of the scale, surely if you offer loyal support, service or commitment to whatever aspect in your life, you have every reason to expect the same loyalty in return? And if this is not the case, why on earth would you then allow one individual to influence your outlook on life and become the carrier of your own little misery cloud? You cannot give that kind of power to someone who does not deserve your loyalty and is not worth you changing your outlook on life.
And no, I am not suggesting that you keep hitting your head against a brick wall of disdain and loyalty not returned. If your loyalty is not returned in spite of your best efforts, then perhaps the message is to remove yourself from that environment before it does poison you into believing that the alternative is acceptable. Blind loyalty which is not reciprocated should not be taken too such an extent that it borders on abuse which cannot be a good thing. It takes a brave person to recognize when it is time to walk away.
If you are lucky enough to have a loyal person in your world, perhaps you should consider how best to hang on to them - they appear to be very few and far between.
There is a special little being in my world that reinforces my belief in loyalty on a daily basis. If anything, he teaches me that loyalty should be offered to everyone who touches your life, whether they deserve it or not, and keep being loyal until such time that they prove they are unworthy.
Ian got a call from our Vet about 4 years ago about a little dog whose owner wanted to put him down because she was moving into a flat. Ian immediately said we would take him and the most cantankerous, aggressive little fellow arrived at our house. We assume that he was left to his own devices a lot of the time (he hates thunder) and was only brought out to be shown off (he has a pedigree a mile long) and had no concept of what cuddling was all about.
I don't "do" little dogs normally (although there are five of them in my world) and I made no effort to make friends with Doobi. I did not try and pick him up or cuddle him (he growled and snapped) so just let him be - which is normally within a meter radius of wherever I am. One day I went down on my knees looking for something I had dropped and Doobi went gaga - responding to what I think he saw as my invitation to play. He ran around giddily, snuggled up to me, rolled over and offered his belly for a rub, and completely came to life!
Since then, cuddles are a regular thing, with him running up my tummy to land on my chest for a good head and body massage and then curling up by my feet for a nap. He waits politely till he is invited into bed at night and lies really close to me. He is the only one of our dogs who actually sits and eats his meals like a real gentleman (the rest are constant snackers). Strangely, when there is thunder in the air he seeks out Ian's lap and sits there and vibrates until the noise dies down.
He will not demand attention from anyone who comes to our house by jumping up and down. He simply sits in front of them till they notice him and give him some attention - however will not tolerate being picked up. In my world he lives up to his reputation of being an "Officer and a Gentleman".
So Grant, I got Doobi, not because I wanted loyalty, but because he needed a home and decided to adopt me to guard and look out for. He is always there and willing for a game and has a way of looking at the world with such wisdom and empathy - like he knows something we do not.
Perhaps he knows that loyalty is easy - commit to a course of action and stay with it and more often than not your loyalty will be returned. In buckets. By humans. You just need to show them how.......
